I Forgot About Myspace.com

So the other night i wake up and I start thinking about you. I dont like the way things were left between us. I always thought that you were awesome so i want you to know that I only think good things about you and i hope your life is going well. Im sorry about he bass but i had to keep it to even the score. You broke my heart, lied about being a lez, etc so i think i deserved something. So now the crazy part. Remember when you worked in Starbucks, and you would fantasize about me, that i was married, with a kid, but we could sneak off to the bathroom or something... Well now its true. Somehow i wound up married with a 6 mo old daughter! You could be my secret girl on the side though so let me know;-) write me back if you want. If not just know that i am out here and if you ever want or need me you can find me.

(found in my myspace.com mailbox)
What The Fuck?!

Honestly guys do I give off the impression of being mistress material only? Is that why my life seems to include a huge list of assholes and taken assholes? And whatever happened to spellcheck?

And this whole time I thought I looked like a cute girl who is rarely associated with the images of sex. When did "IMMORAL SLUT" get written across my forehead and why did no one bother to tell me? I mean I have really good face wash from Bliss.

I'm pretty sure my actions don't yell that at all. Fucker.